"Distrust all in whom the impulse to punish is powerful" - Friederich Nietzsche

It was nice for a while, but in the end, life, more often than not, returns to normalcy. Despite how I felt about her, despite how hard I tried, despite the pain, in the end, it just wasn't to be. I made mistakes along the way. I tried too hard. I got overexcited, and in the end I paid the price. I thought I could change myself to suit her world, but I guess in the back of my mind I knew that it was an impossible dream. Now while all this was falling apart, I found out that some people who I thought were my friends, weren't. I felt betrayed, but more than that I was disappointed. I was so disappointed that these guys had such little honor, that they cared so little. That's what drove me away. So in the end, I lost the majority of my friends, and once again I find myself alone, the ruins of my life around me.

So, by necessity, I've re-evaluated things. I'm done with hope, done with faith. I can't believe in anything but myself anymore. Whatever my destiny is, if I like it, I'll go along with it, if not, I'll fight to change it or die trying. What I do know is that I was born to help people. What few friends I have left I'll protect with everything I have. I'm going to take my meaningless life and find a purpose at any cost. Until I do, my life is forfeit; I walk alone. A Swedish diplomat named Dag Hammarskjold once said: "Pray that your loneliness may spur you into finding something to live for, great enough to die for." We'll see where my lineliness leads me. For now though, my red thread of fate is cut. Therer's no one at the other end.